The Immoderate F2Per … Me

legshairyYes … well, I didn’t have an appropriate screen shot so I thought I’d find something that might be useful to readers. Do you find you’re getting hit on excessively? Can’t grocery shop without unwanted advances? No worries! An enterprising Chinese company has come up with hairy leg panty hose to help! I know I’ll be ordering … on second thought I doubt it will help in my case. I get hit on by neighborhood dogs as they all know I carry dog biscuits. LOOK! LOOK! It’s the dog candy lady! Oh goody, she now has fur on her legs, even better! Yeah … maybe not.

Anyway, I was at MMO Melting Pot reading Is Free To Play worth the money? I read the posts and thought … hmm … interesting … maybe I’ll look into my spending habits.

So Neverwinter is easy to analyze, I’ve been playing a week and a half now. I use PayPal for any purchases, I’ll see what I spent. I’m sure I was …WTF! WTF!

I’m sure PayPal is being jokey … it’s a prank. Those comedians at PayPal, ha ha … ha.

According to PayPal, (who I’m sure is pulling my leg) I have spent 100 gold dollars in that week and a half. That’s just not possible.

Well, sure I had to have a companion right away, can’t wait until level 16 and get one for free, I might not play that long. That makes sense, doesn’t it? And these Nightmare Lockbox thingies keep dropping and I can’t NOT KNOW what’s in them so of course I have to buy keys. And how long will it take to make enough gold to buy a mount … forever …

Yeah … crap … I’m a whale.

I have never done this before, honest. Has Cryptic found some secret formula to lure the unsuspecting into profligate spending? I have an alternate theory.

YES! The case of my madness corresponds exactly! It’s not my fault!

The incredibly LOUD constant buzzing of the cicada invasion drove me to it. Beside the noise, the driveway every morning looked like Battlefield: Barrens with dying bodies strewn everywhere. Add to this the dogs habit of eating so many of these same cidadas that they constantly regurgitated horrible balls of carcasses.

Big whew … boy, I feel better knowing that is was temporary insanity caused by bugs. I hate to tell you Cryptic, but the cicadas are about done now. You can take my name off that whale list now … it might even be safe to login.

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23 Responses to “The Immoderate F2Per … Me”

  1. Ah, yes, those hidden costs seem to bite ya in the buns. Don’t feel bad, I’ve thrown some serious cash in the same direction myself and sat her going WTF just as much. :D

  2. And here I thought that buzzing was the Klaxxl.

    • Maybe they were tiny Klaxxi because the very worst thing about them was they’d fly into my hair and when dislodging they would scream! Really, no lie, lol.

      • Our last cicada brood was back in 2004, so we’ll be due in 2021.

        I remember cicadas everywhere back in 1987, my senior year of high school. The senior French class played a prank on their teacher by collecting the hordes of dead cicadas and strewing them throughout the classroom. As the after school worker whose job it was to clean up that particular room, I was not amused….

  3. Okay – now I am desperately searching for this documentary I watched on cicadas the other day http://vimeo.com/66688653

    Tome- you scare me sometimes. Really. But I just sit here and say WTF for no reason at all. Really wonder WTF I am doing sometimes.

    I think those pantyhose might attract attention I didn’t intend. Nothing like an amorous neanderthal to spice up the mood in the cave.

    • What a beautiful video. The noise at it’s peak was so loud for the first couple days I kept running around the house trying to find where the water was running until I remembered, oh, it’s them.

      Saying WTF is good, I yell it out frequently, just ask my husband. Don’t do it in front of my daughter though, I’ll get in trouble.

      Hopefully the sellers of those panty hose don’t take PayPal or who knows, they might be my next purchase!

      • I am so glad you like the video – I was intrigued. The drama! The struggle! Damn, all these little worlds we never really look at. I think it’s funny your daughter tries to curb your tongue. As if.

        • I knew a little about their life cycle but that really brought it home.

          She’s much more ladylike than I am and is a girly girl, again unlike me. She probably needs those pantyhose, lol.

  4. I’ve been good so far in Neverwinter … but I’ve only played one night so …. heh. I’ve played other games though where I spent and then facepalmed later when I realized how much I’d gone through.

    That blossoming ancient in the Blizz pet store last week though? Yeah, you know I bought that baby the second I got home. ^.^
    WoW pets and mounts don’t count, right? RIGHT??

    • They absolutely don’t count! WoW pets and mounts are necessities like food and water.

      Hopefully I’ve calmed down in Neverwinter since I never get anything good out of those lockboxes anyway. It was an eye-opener to actually see what I had spent so I feel better blaming my batshit craziness on the poor cidadas, lol.

  5. SO WHAT WAS IN THE LOCKBOXES? Inquiring Gnomes want to mine!

    (I was too cheap to pay for Zen, but I’m holding on to them because SOMEDAY THE KEY MIGHT BE A RARE DROP, YO.)

    It’s little things like this that make the subscription model that WoW and others use look like the cheaper route. So many things you can’t do without it.

    But at least they don’t make it so annoying as in that lightsaber game. It’s fairly unobtrusive. Though not being able to recolor my armor has been somewhat vexxing. :)

    Well, good luck getting that spending in check! NW seems to be a pretty fun game, hope it sticks around for a while!

    • So far I’ve pretty much received lackluster runestones from my boxes but then RNG and I have never been close friends, lol.

      I know, I can’t wait to login to my Tailor and MAKE my own bag, so luxurious to have that ability in WoW.

      And yes, the Jedi way of implementation was so annoying I think I made it 5 minutes before I resubbed to play with my son-in-law.

      Thanks, and yes, NW has been a lot of fun so far. I hope they’ll manage the skeletal invasion without me for a few hours cause we really need groceries!

  6. I’ve considered trying Neverwinter but atlas I just haven’t found the time to start up yet another game that I’ll prolly only play the once.

    • I pretty much thought the same thing but I thought, hey, I have room for another game on the hard drive, I’ll give it a shot and I haven’t been able to quit. It’s not unusual for me though, my track record is a couple months and then back to WoW full time. Interesting to see if it’s different this time.

  7. I’ve got to stop reading these and go buy food but that first one had me laughing so hard I probably couldn’t drive anyway.

    What’s interesting too is how dogs and humans have so much in common, random reward works on both of us.

    Will finish these after I procure food for non-gaming husband, thanks Roo!

  8. Roo the Hunter Says:

    and one last item :D you might have to hunt and peck (sorry) and they may not be the best of links, but it is enough to know, “I’ve been had”. :)

  9. First, are you not happy that you looked at your cost now, instead of a couple more months! That’s usually where I gang aft a-gley.

    Second, the wife has detested cicadas since a bad experience of many dead shells cascading from the trees… And her favorite game was Animal Crossing, in which the buzzing of the bugs was disturbing…

    Third, some of us could wear that hose and REDUCE our hirsuteness. If there were a demand, I might be able to supply the necessary leg hhair for many friends.

    • LOL! Then you could start a cottage industry and get a jump on that Chinese company!

      Oh no, your poor wife! I had them fly into my hair but luckily didn’t have any rain down on me.

  10. Tome – delete my posts with the links! Please do it now and don’t use them. I apologize upfront to you and everybody else who may have clicked on them. I work in IT and I would never send anyone to a bad link, but one of those will give you a bad virus. A new one that got thru the 2 we use at the college (the network anti-virus and Symantec on the local pc’s.) on my normal work desktop and I am playing heck getting it cleaned up.

    Please do accept my apologies.

    If it makes you feel better, go to AVG antivirus site, business side and download their AVG for standalone – CD/DVD or USB. Follow the links to make a bootable USB AVG stick and check your systems.

    Again, please accept my apology.

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