I am a Boss, Hear me RAWR!

meanieIn certain circles irl I’m not known as Cat or Tome or Ancient. I’m known as Mimi. All the other traditional terms were already taken so yeah … I’m Mimi. At my mother’s birthday celebration yesterday, my six year old granddaughter proclaimed that she was going to be a chef when she grew up. This little one does not eat, she appears to live solely on oxygen. It’s a constant concern of her mother’s and mine too. The ONLY thing she will usually even consider consuming is bacon, yep, bacon. Birthday cake? Nope, just … bacon.

So  I told her I thought that was unlikely as how would she know what her dishes taste like as she wouldn’t try them. Oh dear … this caused the lamentations of the small, tiny, angry woman.

“You are NOT Mimi!” “You’re name is MEANIE!” MEANIE THE DREAMBREAKER, that’s who you are!”

Oh geez, she’s got a point there, I remember telling my daughter she couldn’t grow up to be a tree.

Okay, well I had to try to cheer her up but it’s hard when you’re rolling around on the floor … you know … LMAO.

So I told her I might be wrong after some thought, I thought she would indeed be a great, well known chef. She would come to be known throughout the land as the GREAT CHEF BACÓN. I mean not just a stupid regular O bacon but a fancy Ó chef.

So I continued to yell, CHEF BACÓN loudly and with a phony French accent repeatedly and that did the trick. Being somewhat mollified now, she agreed to at least eat a multiple vitamin. I know, but it’s something.

But now I’m quite excited, I’m sure Blizzard will be contacting me any time now for an audition! I just know it! They’ll want the dreaded Meanie the Dreambreaker boss in the next expansion!

Let’s see … it could be about the Emerald Dream gone horribly wrong. Previously good, kind Druids go bonkers and roam the land leaving death and destruction in their wake.Yes! Yes! That’ll work!

FEAR ME! FEAR ME! All will fall before MEANIE THE DREAMBREAKER … well, until a raid comes and kills me but still, I’m so excited, I’ve got to go practice my roar.

RAWRRRR RAWRRRRRRRRRRR!

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17 Responses to “I am a Boss, Hear me RAWR!”

  1. How to Defeat Meanie: Give her pets.

  2. Oh no! Looks like Stormwind will be in need of some repairs again.

  3. acbarberi Says:

    Haha funny story.

  4. The Dreambreaker. Awesome. I cannot begin to create the list of unflattering titles the inhabitants of the Matty-shack would bestow upon me.

    Love this story. Am curious: why the chef idea? Ask her what is life like for chefs… And I know you know food is the only thing wee ones feel they can control in a chaotic world. Bacon? Sure. I’d rather have bacon than birthday cake too. Smart girl.

    • I am curious too but couldn’t get an answer. I thought it was a strange career choice for someone who doesn’t eat. Yeah, I’m a fan of bacon too, I get a piece once a year or so … on birthdays, lol.

      • She may be a true gourmand: it is not quantity but quality, and specialization. Perhaps she is interested in discovering creative ways to use bacon. In the meantime, I am compiling that list…:)

  5. I remember my son (3yo) saying “When I are a big boy when I are six”. As acbarberi says funny story

  6. /cower

  7. Still laughing at Meanie the Dreambreaker :) she sounds gorgeous.

  8. Meanie the Dreambreaker
    Was spawned of the Legion
    She’d forcefeed you Vitamins
    And feared in all regions.

    But Mimi inside her
    Would warm you like brandy
    If you smiled just right, then
    She’d give you more candy

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