A Farewell to Arms and Arthas
JD Kenada is leaving WoW. He has excellent reasons for his departure and I’m happy because he’ll still be blogging. But there is a PROBLEM. As a farewell to Azeroth he wants to storm Icecrown Citadel and kick Arthas’ butt. What a great idea JD, that’s excellent, good luck, I think … WHAT … me? Huh?
I have never been in a raid, well, I have but only with me. I recently had an epiphany of sorts about me and raiding which made me happy, and I don’t know why it took me five and a half years to have it, but thanks to Navimie I now know my place in WoW. But that’s another story for another time.
I commented on JD’s post saying he really wouldn’t want me along as I’d be no help dead, and his response was:
We could wipe for an hour on the first pull and I wouldn’t care so long as you come with us.
Oh man. I mean IT IS prophetic, but so damn nice of him to say. So yeah. Druid doesn’t even really know where it is so she thought she’d ask Tirion Fordring. She’s not that good with directions. But I think she found it, there seemed to be lots of people rushing in with great urgency.
So anyway, I thought I should tell JD he could count on me but I must WARN him what he’d be getting into, really, it’s only fair.
My excuses are legion, but I’ll try to keep it brief, just hit the highlights.
1. My performance would be strictly bush league, if that. I have never raided and I’m easily distracted by pretty colors and effects. I’ve noticed when I watch videos of raids I rarely notice bosses or anything, I’m just kinda groovin’ on the light show and sounds and the pretty colored puddles on the floor. Just saying.
2. I fall off things … a lot. From viewing a video this looks like a potential problem in this fight.
3. I run off things a lot. Yes, there’s a theme emerging here, I’ll get to it.
4. I get lost ALL THE TIME. Don’t know if that’d be an issue here but if I die the likelihood of you ever seeing me again is pretty low cause I’ll never be able to find you.
5. I only kitty Druid moderately well. As I’m usually alone, I tend to forget I can heal or bring the dead back to life, you have to poke me and yell at me to remind me, and then I think I only have about 52 mana.
Okay, this could go on and on, crappy gear, yada, yada, but I’ll get to the big one that’s the cause of a lot of the above.
6. At some point in the evening I can no longer SEE. This is part of why I fall and run off things, that and being a nitwit. I have very bad allergies so certain times of the year my contacts become unbearably painful to keep in. This can happen anytime between 5:00 and 8:00pm eastern depending on pollen count. And then you’ll be stuck with a blind raid noob Druid probably running about willy nilly, bumping into everything in there shouting, “Yay! Am I helping guys, huh, am I, is this the waaaaaaayyyyy … oops.”
A little off topic but this is also why I have an aversion to talking in vent. I sound like a Worgen … sniff, sniff … sniff … excessive throat clearing if I need to speak, sigh … charming.
So yeah, I got your back JD, just wanted to let you know what a dangerous position that is for you. So email will be incoming but again, seriously, I don’t mind being the last kid on the playground picked. If you find you have to use me to fill the last spot … pray for rain on the east coast!