Real ID Chat Etiquette

What does that have to do with Real ID? Nothing, I just thought I’d show you how ridiculous a computer addiction can get, I’ll get to Real ID in a minute. The heat pump repairman has come and gone. I was hoping that he could just top off the refrigerant or something, no but, the compressor’s gone so he’ll have to come back … sometime.

So short of dragging this computer and all it’s accompanying parts and bits downstairs, this is what I’ve come up with. Kind of a swamp cooler. Homemade. I feel a lovely cool breeze, really. It’s all in belief, you have to believe.

Anyway, most people may not have this Real ID problem, but if you’re shy or an introvert you may have it too. Having not been in a guild most of my WoW career I’m not used to having people there to talk to and I always get in predicaments because I’m really not sure of the etiquette, there must be some.

Shy people can be difficult to deal with, I’m one and so is my husband. For example, you login and see I’m on. I don’t say anything, not a word. What the hell is up with that? You thought we were buddies, what’s up? What’s up is a shy person thinks, oh, I don’t want to bother them. They are probably talking to other people, I don’t want to interrupt. Sigh.

The only way my husband and I got together was we worked in the same cubicle for three years and I was devious and told him I was moving to Florida. Yes, I had to resort to trickery to get a proposal. So yeah, I’m not proud of it but these shy people can be difficult to deal with sometimes, they need a little push.

My real problem is I worry about not answering. I mean if you’re in an instance, old DBM handles all that, but if your level 67 No Death Ironman gets jumped by three mobs, what’s the correct etiquette there. Common sense says just respond after it’s safe but I have a hard time doing that, it seems so rude. The other day my Hunter was picking flowers, and then I had to watch her almost get beaten to death by a waspy thing and two crocolisks as I couldn’t bear not answering right away. Her pet had done one of those appear with almost no health thingys and didn’t survive long enough to help her.

And I really get all flustered when I’m having two or three conversations simultaneously. It’s so bad I sometimes tell one friend, OMG, I’m trying to talk to two people at once, OMG! He’s very nice and stops chatting to relieve the stress, what a nut. Me, not him. The worse time was when there were about five people on and I was afraid to go downstairs to get a drink because they might say something and I’d be ignoring them. It seemed like overkill to type brb to five people I wasn’t talking to at that moment just in case … but I thought about it.

I sort of do the same thing irl as I madly flail my arms about at every passing car, dump truck, whatever, on the dog walk. Don’t want anyone to feel ignored.

Geez, and now I just realized I do the same thing here. I am incapable of not responding to every comment individually and immediately, wow, this problem runs deeper than even I had suspected.

I guess I’ll get the hang of it. Or maybe not, I still seem to play with the assumption that the harder I hit the keys the more it hurts the mob. I know, logic just doesn’t seem to come into it. It’s feeling like Heat Stroke Level Four in here so I’m off to get some more ice for my homemade air conditioning unit.



28 Responses to “Real ID Chat Etiquette”

  1. Says:

    Here is the secret of extroverts: we love to hear ourselves talk, and rarely notice if no one is listening. Never fear, dear Tome – be in your own world, and if some one knocks, look through the peep hole first. It’s your world, and you don’t have to let folks in. It’s funny how my Real ID friends and I have established the unspoken rules of speaking- never, ever no harm no foul. And the good thing about playing predominately with men is, they tend to be very direct, and even when I think something is wrong, it’s not.

  2. While I don’t bug everyone who’s on my BattleTag friends all the time, I certainly have no qualms with not answering anyone’s messages. >_> I’ve wandered away from the computer before midconversation… whoops!

    I’m sure you’ll get the hang of it though. :3

    (And I hope your AC gets fixed soon! Or that the weather cools down!)

    • Hi Mishaweha! I’m getting better, but if I step away from the computer for a minute I always scroll through chat to make sure I didn’t miss anything, lol.

      Supposed to have thunderstorms later so maybe that’ll help cool things down.

  3. clumsygrrrl Says:

    “The other day my Hunter was picking flowers, and then I had to watch her almost get beaten to death by a waspy thing and two crocolisks as I couldn’t bear not answering right away.”

    That’s my life, right there.

  4. i’m kinda like you in the sense of responding to stuff… I will often type at *least* a quick “one sec!” mid-cast to let the person know i saw the message. cause honestly, even if DBM responds back, i very well could have missed it coming through during a raid…
    i also tend to not be the first one to message a person. unless it’s someone that i talk to alllll the time anyway.
    oh, and yay for kinda swamp coolers. i live in the land of no A/C, so when it gets icky hot, that’s what i do! lol

    • It’s good to know I’m not alone. Matty says extroverts don’t care if you’re listening, I never, ever would have known that. I do the “just a sec” too, it’s like some unseen power makes it impossible not to respond.

      I think it’s working rather well, at least I feel like it’s cooler, hope the computer does too.

  5. That portable AC unit works just fine (it really is one, although not nearly as efficient as a powered model with freon (or equivalent these days).

    I pretty much don’t say anything to my (few) RealID friends unless the mood strikes me or something is going on that I need to contact people about. I used to wonder when people didn’t respond, but I’ve learned to shrug it off. And believe me, that’s coming from an introvert.

    • It’s working pretty good but now I need to have a chat with the refrigerator about stepping up ice cube production.

      It’s funny, the few times I’ve had no response I just figured they were away from the computer or busy. I’m sure that’s what they’d think of me too so I don’t know why I stress about it so much.

      I figured there must be some more introverts out there!

      • Yeah, you’d never guess I’m an introvert if you heard me on Twisted Nether, but I’m definitely one. (And my wife can vouch for that!)

  6. JD Kenada Says:

    Don’t feel bad at all. Quite often when I log on I am the one who initiates conversation with others. It doesn’t bother me, it’s simply something I noticed. So, it’s not just you shy ones.

    I can remember if the “HE” you’re talking about is me or if we merely had a similar discussion one day and I stopped until you were free to chat, heh.

    You’ve hit the etiquette pretty well. If you’re busy, you’re not obligated to anyone to respond. Heck, I have guildmates logging on these days while I’m doing cut scene central, aka Harrison Jones & Uldum. Half the time I don’t even see the original comments. Come to think of it, Real ID gets the same treatment in those cases. Either way, I just apologize and explain.

    If you have the time to respond, but are overwhelmed, just use your Real ID broadcast message at the top of your friends window to say so and everyone will get your “brb” or whatever you have to say at the same time. 😉

    • I know, I even worried about the cut scenes and have to quickly scroll through chat when they’re done.

      But I am learning, I did know that you are available to talk to if I catch you logging in!

      And I have to remember the message thing, I always forget about it.

  7. Hehe, I know what you mean, but I obsess over answering correctly in the right tone saying the right things blabla that I am too hesitant. Then 5 minutes has passed and meanwhile I’ve typed, then deleted, then typed, then deleted my message and still haven’t responded *headdesk* And it just makes it all the more awkward. If I get really comfortable around someone, it gets better, but damn I feel so silly often.

    Your post also reminded me of a Bossy Pally Classic that I find greatly amusing and I can totally recognize it in myself:

    • OH! I forgot about that one, I do that too. Type and retype and fix typos and then hit enter and get the message that the person is no longer online, lol.

      I think I may have read it but I’ll have to go and check it out!

  8. Ok, first of all LMAO.
    Secondly, as one who took all her RealID friends off her list a few months ago, there were a good number that I didn’t really converse with or vise versa. I usu say ‘sec’ or try and type something quickly which leaves my spelling to be desired :S

    I do tend to alt-tab A LOT so you may be lucky if I respond at all sometimes.

    However, after recent events and the overwhelming response, I think I’m ready to start adding a few to my RealID list again 🙂

    • Geez yeah, my spelling is usually horrifying, I wonder if there’s a spellcheck addon lol!

      I alt-tab a lot too, if I’m in a zone I like to check to see if there may be something I want to get or see while I’m there.

      I’m just so glad you’re back with all your gear and money!

  9. Yeah, I feel quite weird having all of these people on my friends list. And I think I’ve talked to one of the 20 or so I now have on there. I just don’t know what to say. So.. BRB!

    • LOL! What’s funny is I’m remembering another thing that I did when I first started this blog. If someone commented to my comment I felt rude if I didn’t respond again and then sometimes they apparently were like me so you’d see about 12 comments back and forth cause neither of us could stop!

  10. Oh God, I thought you were talking about me! You might be! I’m terrible sometimes, I will chat chat then suddenly.. nothing. Then suddenly…. log off. Raiding, arena, afk, work…. I was wondering am I one of those awful realID friends that you think – hey, how come u talked to me and suddenly now you’re not? And I must disturb you all the time because I’m always chatting.

    I never thought I was an extrovert. I just like to talk to people that I like. And there are so many things I want to tell you that I forget that sometimes you might want to say “Navi, please. I’m dying, can you stop for a sec?” And that’s ok! Just tell me, I can be a good girl and be quiet. Even if it’s only for 1 minute.

    • Nope, it’s not you Ms. Navi. I know all the things you do so if you stop talking I just think you’re in the arena or making another mog outfit and I look forward to hearing from you, you’re not disturbing me and I’m learning to speak aussie from you, if you don’t chat how will I learn, lol!

  11. I actually had a tiny laughing fit when I realized the picture was your no-AC-quick fix. Brilliant!

    I always try responding to people, but not at such lengths that I will drop what I’m doing in-game if it gets my toon into trouble, and never when I’m doing arena or during progress raids – since that would mean letting other people down. Like Navimie and Cym, I afk quite a lot or am tabbed out of WoW. People have gotten used to it, it seems, sometimes I forget to clear my AFK mark when I’m back, and I notice no one talks to me, then I clear it, and suddenly the conversation’s back on. I don’t think many people would get upset when you sometimes can’t reply, though, after all – they all know what it’s like when you play WoW. ;>

    • I may be using that longer than I thought because they said they’d call me yesterday to schedule a day to fix it and no call yet!

      My poor characters have died quite a few times because of my need to respond. I remember thinking a bunch of abominations in Strath couldn’t kill my bear form, but oops, if you leave her there long enough I found out they could, she wasn’t pleased with me!

      I need to remember that I can mark myself “away” then I probably wouldn’t have a problem thinking I’m being rude.

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