Midnight at the Oasis

So yeah … okay, not midnight but Ironsally does live at the oasis in Uldum in a teeny, little, tent. Ramkahem gets way too much traffic, she’s seen too many skeletons around there, not safe.

It has been one of THOSE weeks. The wonderful thing is though that I can blame some of the problems on my characters. My failed Mage Banker made a stupid mistake. I was feeling sorry for my neglected Shaman and thought maybe I’d want to play her if I could upgrade some of her gear to an appropriate level for Dread Wastes.

I tasked the Banker with this mission, procure at least one decent Shaman weapon. Simple, yes? Well, Banker Mage saw a suitable weapon, bought it, retrieved it from the mail and then saw she had clicked on the wrong weapon and paid 4,000 gold for it. I told her one more mistake like that and it’s back to the big scary world for her. That got her attention.

And then irl I grabbed the leash of a very large runaway dog to keep it from scaring an approaching woman and her dog. It’s amazing the momentum a German Shepard can build up in a very short time, ouch. So I pranged my shoulder all out of whack. This reduced me to one-handed typing which makes almost EVERYTHING I do nearly bloody impossible.

I’m reduced to activities like logging into Neverwinter every once in a while to level professions. I can manage that. So I was feeling grumpy and sorry for myself.

Then Matty’s perfectly timed post! The elusive Coilfang Stalker is now mine! Matty and Señor had kicked that Lady Vashj’s butt and wrestled it from her cold, dead hands! And a Tainted Waveling to boot! It’s like those two are psychical or something! I cheered right up.

Thank you both so much!

Dramatization: A Wake Up Call

Yes, there’s Cat. Dead again. Matty was nice enough to accompany Cat to Serpentshrine Cavern this week. Cat’s two last pets for the achievement are in there and she always gets fed up at 2 or 3 cores and leaves.  Matty came to help with that bitch Vashj so she could get a shot at the pet … and this is the thanks she gave Matty. Sprawled on the ground dead waiting to be revived while Matty saved the day … twice. I KNOW!

What is going on here? I kept thinking that the problem was that I couldn’t build combo points on those low level mobs to get access to a Predatory Swiftness heal. It wasn’t until MUCH later that I happened to look at my UI and see an unfamiliar spell. OMG! What an idiot! Renewal, I had totally forgotten I had that.

I know it’s bad enough that I never thought to go bear form but I forgot I had a heal usable in Cat form. What is up? Where has all Cat’s druidy knowledge gone?

Could it be too much of this? She does pet battle excessively, sometimes to the exclusion of all else. It’s like an addiction with her. Or could it be my fault?

Have I spent too much time hanging out with my cute bodyguard? I seem to be able to hold only two classes at a time in my head well enough to keep them alive. Sasche’s still okay, but my darling Cat I have let down by trying to play a Feral Druid, Warlock, Trickster Rogue and Control Wizard simultaneously. The rest of my alts get by with me randomly mashing a bunch of keys because they don’t do anything that dangerous, but poor Cat. I’m so sorry.

I’ve also been distracted by sightseeing because of the Midsummer Fire Festival. Those horrible Kor’kron bullies are in Nagrand! Since I don’t raid I don’t usually get that worked up about the villain of an expansion, I mean in Cata I spent the entire time seeking Deathwing so he’d kill me in flames. But this time I really, really … no, REALLY hate Garrosh. I’ll be glad when you guys kill him. OVER AND OVER!

So anyway, they might be pulling Cat’s Cenarion membership card. I hope not, cause it was my fault. To make it up to her I bought her a new pet, a Living Fluid. Not sure if that will help with her druidness but it certainly cheered her up.

Now I’ve got to go down the Staircase of Forgotten Memories and see if I can remember to put the trash out for pickup when I get down there. Probably not. I really need the Helm of Memory Protection to drop.

Isle of Thunder … Chasin’ Love in all the Wrong Places

In a recent post Redbeard said, “I’m actually disappointed that nobody has created a WoW music video based on Jay Ferguson’s 70’s tune.” I didn’t want him to be disappointed so in case no one makes a proper video here’s this instead!

I felt kind of guilty tricking Cat into thinking love might be had on the Isle of Thunder but she took it rather well. She packed up her Romantic Picnic Basket and is probably out there right now chasin’ love. Good luck Cat!

A Lovely Place to Die

Yep, Drak’Tharon comes through for Ironsally on the second day. I had my misgivings about leaving Sally on a PvP server but I’m beginning to like it there.

Anyway, I had been reading comments at Wowhead and there were some chilling tales of jackassery to do with the capture of the Qiraji Guardling so I logged into Sally with some trepidation yesterday around 6:00am. That I found one was not such a big deal but THIS to me was a big deal.

Okay I lied, it was a big deal to me to capture it, my hands were shaking so bad it’s a wonder I managed not to kill it but NICE PEOPLE! Two people who I’m sure wanted one as bad as I did were kind enough to congratulate me, yeah in WoW … PvP server. I swear, this made my day almost as much as FINALLY getting the Zookeeper.

I tried to think of a way to use their names to name my Guardling … Nodestny? Nah … Sylentnoko? I finally gave up and instead named the Guardling Benevolence, in their honor.

So Sally’s staying on Drak, she can’t think of a better place to die … repeatedly.

Aw … So Sweet … Pet Lovers … OW!

Yeah, Ironsally’s just asking for trouble here. Apparently only Horde are pet lovers on Drak’Tharon. Right after I took this shot a Death Knight attacked her, it’s really embarrassing as I HAVE a Death Knight but I have no idea what they did, lol. Seemed to be some kind of damage over time, so he was dismounted but she was not and she managed to fly to safety and heal up before she died. The hunt for a Qiraji Guardling may take a while.

Cat! NO! NO! Sara Finkleswitch is THE DEVIL! DO NOT take that PvP battle quest! You just got back and you know it’s what drove you away before … just NO!

So over in Neverwinter I was all over the End of Neverwinter Open Beta Event. Towards the end, portals were opening every five minutes and there was a possibility of a rare skeletal dog dropping, never mind that I had the above pictured not rare one. So yesterday, I think around noon, beta was over. No more portals and a shocking thing happened … my ardor waned. I mean I still like it but I felt the pressing need to get back to Azeroth.

It’s a predicament for sure. By my calculations I have to play Neverwinter for seven months without spending anymore real money to break even as though it were a subscription. I even have an alt, a Trickster Rogue. I don’t know if they are OP or maybe the early quests are designed for someone without a companion but man, I would not want to be on her bad side.

And she’s pretty clever too, I had been accidentally getting somewhere where I could zoom in and out without the UI for screen shots, she’s the one who found out it’s the “B” key used to get into inspect mode.

So anyway, I think I found out that I like games with spontaneous groups banding together to fight evil, it’s what I loved about Rift. Probably why I like world bosses in WoW, if I ever find a game where the whole world is total constant chaos 24/7 I’ll probably have found another home, just haven’t yet.

Okay my fine Neverwinterians, you’ve got 7 months, show me what you got. In the meantime, Ironsally’s going to be sneaking around Drak’Tharon looking for a safe place to camp. Wish her luck!

The Immoderate F2Per … Me

Yes … well, I didn’t have an appropriate screen shot so I thought I’d find something that might be useful to readers. Do you find you’re getting hit on excessively? Can’t grocery shop without unwanted advances? No worries! An enterprising Chinese company has come up with hairy leg panty hose to help! I know I’ll be ordering … on second thought I doubt it will help in my case. I get hit on by neighborhood dogs as they all know I carry dog biscuits. LOOK! LOOK! It’s the dog candy lady! Oh goody, she now has fur on her legs, even better! Yeah … maybe not.

Anyway, I was at MMO Melting Pot reading Is Free To Play worth the money? I read the posts and thought … hmm … interesting … maybe I’ll look into my spending habits.

So Neverwinter is easy to analyze, I’ve been playing a week and a half now. I use PayPal for any purchases, I’ll see what I spent. I’m sure I was …WTF! WTF!

I’m sure PayPal is being jokey … it’s a prank. Those comedians at PayPal, ha ha … ha.

According to PayPal, (who I’m sure is pulling my leg) I have spent 100 gold dollars in that week and a half. That’s just not possible.

Well, sure I had to have a companion right away, can’t wait until level 16 and get one for free, I might not play that long. That makes sense, doesn’t it? And these Nightmare Lockbox thingies keep dropping and I can’t NOT KNOW what’s in them so of course I have to buy keys. And how long will it take to make enough gold to buy a mount … forever …

Yeah … crap … I’m a whale.

I have never done this before, honest. Has Cryptic found some secret formula to lure the unsuspecting into profligate spending? I have an alternate theory.

YES! The case of my madness corresponds exactly! It’s not my fault!

The incredibly LOUD constant buzzing of the cicada invasion drove me to it. Beside the noise, the driveway every morning looked like Battlefield: Barrens with dying bodies strewn everywhere. Add to this the dogs habit of eating so many of these same cidadas that they constantly regurgitated horrible balls of carcasses.

Big whew … boy, I feel better knowing that is was temporary insanity caused by bugs. I hate to tell you Cryptic, but the cicadas are about done now. You can take my name off that whale list now … it might even be safe to login.

You Know It’s True Love When …

I read Matty’s post about her first kiss. I was trying to remember mine, nothing. Not a clue. So I gave up and decided to yes, log into a game. This is a thing not done lightly, oh no. This takes skill and determination, sometimes I’m successful on my first go … sometimes not.

Years ago I had a gmail account hacked because my password was ludicrously easy to figure out from my email address. Never again. When creating a new password now, I close my eyes and let my fingers spastically drum all over the keyboard … something like this:

n a5ey7[02vf24gy 40 Y7q875CCY]I

I then remove any special characters and spaces and presto! My new password is born!

No one can figure it out … take that you hackers! Problem is I can’t remember them either. And every game and login has a different one.

What does this have to do with first kisses and love? True MMO love is when you’ve got that game’s password MEMORIZED! Apparently I have only one true MMO love, WoW is the only game I can log into without removing the Tome of Passwords from the safe. I got that baby MEMORIZED, this is TRUE LOVE.

I’ve been a little disappointed lately. I rely on this blog to provide me with some comic relief through spam and keyword searches. I’m puzzled by a recent spam approach, insults.

Well I NEVER! Look here Mr. Breast Actives I most certainly did not! Yeah, it’s no Norwegian carrot cake recipe but you work with what you have.

And aren’t we all a bunch of serious business types, sheesh. Spawn points of unborn val’kyrs, camels. Where’s the fun stuff guys!

The best I could come up with is “compulsive wiggle butt.” Yeah … it’s weak but it’s something. You people are all way too serious … lighten up.

One more thing … a warning. The aliens … they are among us.

There is my recreation of what these so called “Tulips” looked like on day one. They looked like nicely behaved flowers. By day three it became apparent they were no ordinary Tulips, they were alien beings trying to surreptitiously work their way upstairs and do WHO KNOWS WHAT while we slept. But the jokes on them.

Day four, GARBAGE DISPOSAL! HAHAHAHAHAHA! We humans will not be conquered THAT easily!

So anyway … just saying … be careful out there.

It’s a Bird … It’s a Plane … No! No! It’s …

Tome Loc riding an Armored Bloodwing! OMG! I knew he was cheeky! Sasche is really steamed, she wants a ride and he took off and it looks like he’s never going to land. He says Matty gave it to him and the girls aren’t having it. Tome Loc! Land that giant bat of awesomeness NOW!

It’s a Birthday/Father’s Day weekend irl. I won’t have time to get to Azeroth and help sort this out, looks like that Blossoming Ancient will be riding in style until I can get back. Luckily (not) my dog made sure I was up at 4:30am so that I would have time to thank Matty. Okay not really, he wanted breakfast but the results are the same.

Thank you so much Matty! I love my Bloodwing! Well, at least I WILL love riding him once that Ancient lands and gives the rest of us a chance at him. I mean Ancients eat don’t they? He’s got to land SOME time.

That’s the best not MY birthday and not a Father gift I’ve ever had!

Finally!

Yay! Blossoming Ancient! I’ve been waiting for you! So far I’ve managed to resist the Armored Bloodwing mount but I’ve been checking every day for the Ancient. I’m trying to decide what to name him. Matty came up with Tome Loc, maybe I’ll name him Tome Loc … yeah … I like that. He’s a lot cheekier than I thought he’d be, I think he’s sticking his tongue out at us there.

Okay … as you were. I was just excited about my new pet, nothing else really going on other than I bought some game time for my son-in-law to try to LURE him back, we’ll see how that goes. Might work, probably won’t, but I gotta give it my best shot. Happy weekend!

Dealbreaker and Confession Time

Yeah … Neverwinter … come on, this could be a deal breaker. Where’s show/hide helm. And that hat isn’t so bad. Her first hat looked something like this.

I am not kidding, how are you supposed to strike terror in the hearts of bad guys looking like that is what I want to know, geez.

Yes, on achieving level twenty I got a horse but he’s a rental. I’m not rich enough to actually buy one … so yeah, rental. This morning I caught myself perusing this page. Founder’s Packs. I think I’ve gone completely mental. I have played many, many, games without this sudden obsession. What is up, what’s going on here.

This all started in WoW so I decided to question Cat.

I found her in the Chamber of Enlightenment asking Historian Winterfur for a book on PvP pet battles. Cat he doesn’t have those, he has lore books. What is the problem here?

Cat sobbed, What We’ve Been Training For is the problem. I’m awful at PvP battles, I spent the whole day in Neverwinter to get away from them.

Oh Cat, I’m sorry. Here’s the problem. You’re like me, you’re spontaneous sorta. I mean you don’t think, you just do. You have to think or at least find someone else who does and learn from them. Here, read Tamer Liopleurodon there’s lots of good information on pet battling there, you’ll learn a lot.

The very thing she loves has turned on her, pet battling. Having a win/loss ratio of the other guy 154, Cat 2 is demoralizing, I know. No wonder she ran off to a different monster-ridden world. Things are becoming clearer now.

Cat I know it’s frustrating but Pandaria needs you now. This morning while reading the Godmother she made a horrible revelation. Well, not really … she didn’t reveal it, I googled until I found what she spoke of … horrific, just horrific. You’d better get back there and enjoy the Vale of Eternal Blossoms while you can.

Cat was SO MAD. Almost mad enough to consider going into LFR to kick Garrosh’s ass when the time comes. Well … maybe not THAT mad but almost. I think she’s off to do Golden Lotus dailies and fish in the beautiful Vale. And maybe do a PvP pet battle or two.

But Cat, you’ve got to get over that hurriedly picking any spell because you think it’s rude to keep the other person waiting … you’ve got to think. I’ve got a playlist made for her for battling. I’m leading off with this. You never know. It might help.