I’m sure you’ve heard my human handler denigrate my mogging abilities. Matty at Sugar & Blood is hosting Azeroth’s Top Leather Model: Leather & Lace, Feathers & Face and I wanted to compete too. Matty says I can so I’m going to be modeling my “Front Line Soldier” look. I’m just one of the grunts, out on the front line protecting my land. No fancy Tyrande Whisperwind outfit for me, no sir. And (pssst!) oh, sorry, just a sec. If you’re going to do this you’re supposed to tell them what you’re wearing. I don’t know what I’m wearing can’t you look it up for me or something? NO! And really Druid, that’s just the same stuff you’ve been wearing since transmogrification came out, they’ve all seen that. You can’t just plop a hat on and think you’re fooling anyone. What’s wrong with the hat, I like the hat, goes with my ears rather well I think. Okay I’ll give you the hat but isn’t that Terestian’s Stranglestaff? Well yeah …so?
Sigh … everyone knows you can’t transmog a polearm to a staff, you’re cheating. Am not. I like this staff. Are so. Okay, fine, do what you want but don’t say I didn’t warn you.
So anyway, this is the front view of my outfit. I’m wearing … ah … I’m wearing, oh yeah Bandit Jerkin, and um a bunch of other stuff. IS THAT FABULOR OVER THERE! IS IT? OMG! I THINK IT IS! He’s so dreamy, oh, maybe I should go over and (pssst!!!) oh sorry, I’ll be right back. WHAT NOW? Druid, you’re OVER THE LINE! Could you try to maintain our dignity here, stop squeeing over all the men. BUT IT’S … Never mind, can we just get on with this, geez.
This is a back view of my front line soldier outfit. And oh, I’m wearing the Cowl of Defiance, you have no idea how hard hat shopping is for a Night Elf but I think this works. I’m wearing a bunch of other stuff too but I don’t remember where I got them and my human handler is being a pill and refusing to do some research for me, typical.
Finally, for the dance part of the competition I will perform the dance of NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO stop that this instant young lady, there is NO DANCE segment in this competition! This is just you trying to attract attention, STOP IT AT ONCE! Oh alright, but I don’t see what the harm is, are you all such prudes over there in real world? I’m not a pr … oh nevermind. Are you happy now, I’m ready to leave, are you coming?
No, I’m staying a little while, I want to see who Matty got to judge. Maybe she got the Dude to judge! Squeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!! Come on guys, enter the competition, I think I see free hors d’oeuvres!!!
O M G. I am SO out of here.