My First Day on the Job as Archdruid

Failure. Utter failure. I missed the money shot and it’s not like I didn’t know it was coming. What is wrong with me. Oh well, maybe the Warlock or Demon Hunter will do better. I think I was so excited that Legion was here I just derped out.

Oh the way to Dalaran to be ready to be up next, my Warlock tried to hide her helm and ended up with a pricey accidental transmog so it wasn’t just Cat dropping the ball.

Okay Cat! Let’s focus! Let’s get those demons running! Cat? Cat!

Yes, it’s clear where Cat’s priorities are. The first thing she did was head to the Barber Shop in Dalaran to camp for the rug. Didn’t take long and, at last! Cat’s very own Dust Bunny! I’m glad she’s happy, I sure don’t need more dust bunnies but to each their own.

Let’s head out Cat! Where are you? Hey!

Cat headed to the sewers. Big, big mistake. No Cat was not paying any attention to word from the beta. She wanted everything to be a surprise … and it was. If you don’t like PVP you won’t like the sewers. Oh look! People are fighting a Rotten Egg! I’ll help! Wait! What! Crap, I’m flagged … I’m dead. Well, then she did read up on the sewers.

There’s supposed to be a guard you can hire for five minutes but reports I see say he’s not all that reliable but we’ll have to keep an open mind and give him a shot.

Okay then! Let’s get down to business …

Cat! Jeez, I found her asleep in the beer garden. I guess all the pet battling and the stress of the sewers wore her out. Let’s see, I guess I can catch you up on what she did.

She started out in Azsuna then kept going back to Val’Sharah because it reminded her of when she first started out in Teldrassil. Then she decided to max her skinning. Then she took off to Stormheim in search of leatherworking patterns and I’m not sure I’ll be able to get her to leave. She loves it there and so do I.

Welp, I’d better head out to help her get another pattern. No telling what she’ll do on her own.

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Stop Me Before I Kill Again

I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’m always … it’s all about the journey … I like leveling and visiting the zones I love again, blah, blah blah. What a hypocrite. As soon as I heard about the XP from the invasions all I have done is level my poor Mage. Pettifog has been sitting at 20 for ages. I can’t Mage well at all. My highest Mage is 54 and my bank alt.

It’s kind of like the Garrison disease. I don’t want to do it but I can’t help myself. Sweet Elune, I am weak. I told Pettifog, okay. But just to level 60 and then off to visit Outland. Welp, next invasion will get her to 70. I must stop. I must end the madness!

Cat did invasions long enough to get the Felbat Pup and that was it for her. Cat’s DH cousin Felwynn did quite a few to learn how to fight but both of them have now had enough of doing them as melee.

I think the whole Fel Spreader thing is a myth. Felwynn joined many a raid and each Doomsayer was covered by someone and … nothing. So having no patience I paid an exorbitant amount of money for the toy and stopped hanging around town in vain.

Cat went off with Khadgar to Karazhan and in typical Cat fashion paid no attention to anything he was telling her and spent the whole time poking at him until he wet his pants. No, really. He did.

Cat then went visiting people she’ll miss when she ships out to fight demons next week. Aw, she’s such a softie that Cat.

So … two and a half more days. Surely Pettifog won’t continue on this breakneck pace. Here’s hoping she stops at level 70. I would enjoy a nice visit to Cata and then maybe I could learn to play a Mage.

And I don’t want to forget to say my goodbyes to Warlords. You were beautiful and I’ll bet I’ll be by again someday. Maybe not soon but someday.

See you all on the other side. Are you prepared?

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Welp, I Can’t Shake This Sense of Impending Doom

After my last post I told myself you can’t do another until you stop whining about real life. I mean it. Enough. Shut up already. So I’m hanging around Stormwind and notice these crazies passing out pamphlets. Whoa … after reading a couple of those I started to think Azeroth might be in for some serious, I don’t know … doom. It certainly did the job of distracting me from real life.

Yeah, I admit the first thing I did after the pre-expansion patch was spend a couple of days getting the Fabulous achievement and fiddling endlessly with everyone’s banks.

I was going to do It All Makes Sense Now the old fashioned way but after the first two doomsayers I’d had enough, so Cat found a great spot in the Dwarven District to repeatedly plummet from the skies and die and have a quick walk back. The only downside Cat said were the two guards standing by her corpse. They REFUSED to turn around when she came back to life in her underwear. Nevertheless she managed to get over her embarrassment and complete it.

There are some weird things going on. Don’t know if it’s just me. Everybody Cat speaks to in her garrison has an echo when they talk, it’s kinda spooky. Then I keep getting dizzy, it’s like screen induced vertigo. Do you think it’s the demons? Naw … maybe it’s just a funky Nvidia driver update. Couldn’t be the demons.

Next up! Talents! So Feral and Warlocks are really the only classes that I know what you’re supposed to be doing. Not like I do what you’re supposed to but I at least know. I mean I know what I’m supposed to be doing with Tigers Fury but I’m too lazy and just stick it on a macro and have it just go off willy-nilly but it works for me and Cat hasn’t complained. So Feral Cat and the Warlocks are ready to kick ass and take names.

After reading a little about Destruction I actually got an addon to keep track of immolate which is totally out of character for the Warlocks. They aren’t that organized.

Uh oh. I  was going to select talents for my Paladin. The first Paladin to ever make it past level 45. I really like her but I kind of cheated to get to 100. She pretty much got to 100 because of an addon on which she’s totally dependent, or really I am. CLCret. It’s looking not too good for an update …

Okay, moving on to my BM Hunter. I selected talents, took her out for a spin and WTF! I’m doing something wrong. I admit to being a very mediocre Hunter but I now appear to be basically a cheerleader for my pet. I spend a lot of time standing around watching them while yelling, yay, you go pet. Any knowledgeable Hunter out there please feel free to tell me where I went wrong.

Okay, my final feeling of impending doom is … I don’t remember how to make money. I just don’t. I am relieved that I’m not tied to the garrison because of my fixation on vast riches but I’ve kind of forgotten how I made money before. I mean I was pretty lazy about it but I did make money … somehow.

Anyway … something evil this way comes … I can feel it. Get ready.

 

 

 

 

 

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Stuff: Buckingham Palace Guards, Movie Critics and Beta Slacker

Yeah, I thought standing at a desk would be no problem. I’m standing all the time while I walk the dogs, do the laundry, pull weeds … I didn’t take into consideration that I’m moving all the time. This standing still thing is HARD. Really hard.

Poor Buckingham Palace Guards, how do they stand still for like TWO HOURS. That guy there must have just finished his shift. I am free! I can move! Jeez, I feel you buddy.

On second thought even though I sympathize with him I’m a little jealous as he probably got off duty and went to see the Warcraft movie. Stupid to be jealous though as I’m pretty sure they won’t have a “standing because you’re butt hurt area” in theaters when it releases here. So yeah, I’ll still be waiting until I can buy it.

But anyway, I’m getting off topic, what I wanted to say is what the hell is up with movie critics? Seriously? I don’t ever read movie critics cause what do I care what some stranger thinks about a movie. How does that help me? For all I know they hate the movie genre.

I don’t mean to be rude but the world’s filled with people with opinions and they are ALL DIFFERENT so why the hell would I want to trust yours.

For example, here’s a sampling of my idea of the finest movies of all time:

Blade Runner

Alien

Lord of the Rings

Serenity

The Losers

Deadpool

And I’m pretty sure Suicide Squad will be put on there after I see it.

See a trend there? Would you really want my opinion of a romantic comedy? No? You’re right, because I’m pretty sure it would be “it’s crap.” Not cause it’s really crap but it’s not mine kind of crap.

So anyway, because it’s a Warcraft movie I started reading reviews. OH MY GOD. It’s the WoW Forums, I swear these reviews are written by the same jackasses who rant and rave on the forums, I’m not kidding.

In almost all cases it’s as though they decided ahead of time that they would NOT like it. I don’t know why, maybe they hate movies based on video games although I don’t think of Warcraft as that. To me it’s about the story behind the game but whatever, they were for the most part really worthy of a ban on the forums.

I think I read three reviews that I thought were fairly considered and not obnoxious. Thank you Great Britain, Philippines and Indonesia (can’t remember their names) for having some class. And no it’s not because they all liked the movie, it’s because they didn’t feel the need to be mean.

I have one requirement of any movie I see. I want to be entertained. I don’t want to have to think, I’m not looking for deep hidden meaning, I want to escape the real world and be entertained for a few hours. That’s it. I’m positive I’ll love the Warcraft movie so I’d make a crappy reviewer cause I’m biased … even if I have to stand for two hours.

Okay, enough righteous indignation. Back to Legion. Celwynn the Demon Hunter is … somewhat of a slacker. Instead of helpfully looking for bugs somewhere this is where I find her.

Okay, here Celwynn, straight from the horse’s mouth:

Demon hunters, disciples of Illidan Stormrage, uphold a dark legacy, one that frightens their allies and enemies alike. The Illidari embrace fel and chaotic magics—energies that have long threatened the world of Azeroth—believing them necessary to challenge the Burning Legion. Wielding the powers of demons they’ve slain, they develop demonic features that incite revulsion and dread in fellow elves.

This is who you are, I mean jeez, wielding the powers of demons. You’re supposed to frighten NOT only your enemies but your allies, get it?

Hanging out with every hot guy you see while riding a Big Love Rocket is NOT cutting it? Go forth and BE SCARY!

Sigh … I think I see the problem. I should have KNOWN a relative of Cat’s probably wouldn’t make the best Demon Hunter … my mistake.

And one more thing.

I had thought double-jumping was the very, very best thing. It’s not, gliding is. I have been beta testing the hell out of that. So see? There’s that. I am at least testing SOMETHING.

 

 

Cosmic Karmic Beta Justice

Oh noooooooo … Cat, don’t go in there, jeeezzz. Yeah, it’s some kind of weird karmic justice that we got a beta invite when I can’t sit in front of the computer for more than 10 minutes at a time, or is the universe telling me I’m a pain in the ass.

I can’t figure out what their method of deciding who gets one is. Maybe it’s who pre-ordered Legion the fastest cause in that case it would make sense. That would be me.

Yes, I HAD to look, figured I would just stay with a Demon Hunter and see how that goes.

I haven’t played enough to reveal anything you don’t want to know. I’ve been trying to figure out how she works. I’m pretty sure it’s not randomly spamming keys like I’m doing now. The problem that I’m having, and I realize it’s probably just me, is that I need a longer period of time to come to terms with new abilities.

The starting area was so full I was feeling pretty confident until I realized everything was going down so fast because three or four more people jumped anything you were killing. I read a forum post about everything being too hard to kill. What? That’s crazy, what are they talking about?

Then came the start of the Demon Hunter Artifact Questline, The Hunt.

Oh …

Crap.

I kinda see what they meant now. It looks like I’m going to have to figure this stuff out before I go broke on repairs. Don’t get me wrong, I LIKE that it’s harder but I don’t think spamming keys is going to cut it.

Next time I login I’m going to have to go look for some Demons or cows or something to practice on. I’m hopeful I’m going to get to play for more than a few minutes at a time soon. My husband has finally accumulated all the necessary pieces and parts for the RAISING OF THE DESK this weekend.

Lookout Demons, come this weekend it will be DEATH FROM ABOVE! I will be standing over your dead bodies here at my … well … desk.

 

 

Gamer’s Butt

Yeah, I’m still here it’s just that I’m not really playing. I login a few times a day to make sure the crew is making money through missions. It has nothing to do with WoW … it’s me.

Cat’s showing you the location of our … um … malady. I have Gamer’s Butt, you could say that I have a giant pain in the ass. The result is I can’t sit down or drive or do anything that can’t be done standing up or laying down. Well, I can but it hurts like hell.

Ischial Bursitis is what it’s called, also Weaver’s Bottom or Tailor’s Bottom. It’s usually runners who get it but I’ve decided to call it Gamer’s Butt so you’ll all be warned, it could happen to you.

Apparently sitting in front of a computer for twenty years working and then sitting in front of a computer after work playing is not without dangers. BE WARNED.

It probably got this bad because I’ve been using the ‘hoping it will go away on it’s own” method of treatment. It wasn’t very successful, so BEWARE! GUARD YOUR FLANK! Stand up every once in a while, don’t be stupid like me.

I HAVE to get this resolved by August 30th or I’m going to have to invest in a treadmill desk.

Okay, I’ve reached my sitting time limit. Miss you and still love you Azeroth. I’m just … butt hurt.

 

Say Something Nice

Lately I feel kinda like Blizzard got a new puppy and is ignoring their poor old dog Wow. I read about Tracer’s butt pose. I thought she looked sassy and cheeky, no pun intended. Could be because I looked at her pose not her butt … maybe it’s just me.

I hope Hearthstone, Heroes of the Storm and Overwatch do well for Blizzard but I thought my old dog Wow needed some love. There have been a lot of negative things said about Warlords and yes, I know I said some of them so I decided to find something nice to say.

BEAUTY

Yeah really, I’ve been in Azeroth since the beginning and to me, the Art Department has NEVER let me down. Flying around and enjoying the world’s beauty and sometimes terror is a frequent activity for me and no doubt many others. So Art Department, you do a most, most, excellent job.

In fact I think you are solely responsible for me not unsubscribing at the ends of expansions when there is squat all to do. You made this my second home.

WARLORDS

I wanted to say something nice specifically to Warlords … um. Let me think, let me think. I have a love/hate relationship with some things like Garrisons. Is there something I’ll miss when I ship out to battle demons? Oh! I know!

As conflicted as my feeling about Garrisons were I loved my Stables. My characters all have favorite mounts which means I don’t even remember having some of my mounts or what they even look like. Rotating favorite mounts every few weeks at the Stables means I get to revisit old favorites. Yeah, you get a gold star Stables.

MUSIC

This is subjective, I know there are those who listen to their own playlists rather than WoW’s music. I do have playlists too but usually only for onerous tasks like grinding.

There’s Cat … lollygagging. I have “flyover warnings” for parts of Draenor. If I’m in a hurry to get somewhere I have to avoid them. There are areas where I have to hang over until the piece finishes. I have “hanging in the air listening to the music” areas. Thank you.

QUESTS

Thanks to my new Paladin’s recent and rapid ascent to 100 I got a chance to revisit some of my favorite quests. It’s kind of a tie between The Drakkensryd in Storm Peaks and Gnomebliteration in Uldum. I even save them for just the right moment.

I want to make sure I can kill as many of those little sons of have plenty of uninterrupted time to enjoy them. Again, thanks WoW.

NPCS

A while ago I was bemoaning the fact that I’d not made any special NPC friends this expansion. Since then I’ve been spending a lot of time on the shores of Shadowmoon Valley pet battling in a probably futile attempt to FINALLY get 2000 pet battles completed for the Garrison monument.

It gets … tedious. I don’t have any pets to level so it’s basically just wanton slaughter but hey! Cool monument!

So anyway, since I’m sort of on autopilot I’ve been listening in on the nearby fishermen conversing with each other and the kids and I realized I liked these people. So I’ll probably NEVER get to freaking 2000 pet battles in Draenor but I’m enjoying the company there at the beach.

So there. There’s a scratch behind the ear for my old dog Wow. I hope he knows how much many of us still love him, new puppies or not.

Have Gun … er, Freaking Giant Two-hander, Will Travel

Oops, oops, oops. Wrong Paladin. Yep, Luz had been 100 for a couple of days now and she sure did travel fast. Hang on a second, let me see if I’ve got something … ah, yes here we go.

Like I said, she travels fast. I remember during the flying kerfuffle people against flying said it breaks their … yep … immersion. I remember thinking why don’t they just not fly then.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAhahaha … cough … I’m sorry … I see now.

I’m always saying, it’s the journey not the destination. Yada yada yada blah blah blah.

So what did I do just because I could? Loaded old Luz up with 10 heirlooms to 60 and 7 up to 90. And then waiting for her at 91 were three crafted 5/6 pieces of gear. She got whiplash the levels went so fast, and throughout she was an unstoppable superhero.

The true test would be hitting Tanaan in 640 iLevel. Well, she’s no longer a superhero but I like her just fine in fact I think she’s overtaken at least two other characters in the hierarchy of mains, sub-mains and so forth. I don’t know why I had such trouble with Paladins before. I think it was a personality thing, I  guess Luz and I just get along.

I’m sad to admit I didn’t have faith. I didn’t bother getting any professions for her as I doubted she’d make it. There is some cussing going on right about now because it looks like her time waiting for Legion will be spent, not making the world a safer place but picking up ore.

I told her it’s all good, she just hit 225 mining. She wasn’t amused.

So now what?

Get to 2000 pet battles for the monument? Archaeology?

Maybe try the impossible.

My first attempt at Mage ended with her retirement before hitting 60 back in Vanilla.

Warrior, Paladin and Mage, can’t seem to get them.

Pettifog? Pettifog? You still out there? Want to give this a try?

 

MMO Observer Effect

I am having an almost uncontrollable urge to rant. I don’t think it’s WoW I think it’s from watching too much  coverage of the U.S. presidential election spectacle. I should know better.

Cat is bored, it’s not that she doesn’t have things she could do it’s just that she doesn’t want to do them. 700 odd pet battles to get her monument … nope.

Continue on with the legendary quest line she’s on … nope.

Archaeology … nope, nope, nope.

She was so bored that she went into Proving Grounds … I know this is ridiculous but it doesn’t hurt to check does it … to see if she could walk out the door and have a quick port to Warbringers. Yeah … no, of course not.

Old Rotun eyed her expectantly.

I did SO not come in here for your stupid proving grounds Rotun. It’s … well … STUPID.

I am NEVER trying for gold, it’s boring and means nothing, I mean as far as determining my skill or lack of it in groups.

There is no one else in here with me, don’t you get it? I can act like I have some sense in here because I’m alone. There’s no MMO Observer Effect in here.

In science, the term observer effect refers to changes that the act of observation will make on a phenomenon being observed.

Okay, they are talking about science there but trust me there’s an MMO Observer Effect. I can’t be the only one who suffers from MMOOE. I  don’t know if it’s a side-effect of introversion or some other ism but it’s real.

So anyone who thinks someone like me completing silver proving grounds means it’s safe to group with me is sadly mistaken, it’s a crappy yard stick of skill for those with MMOOE. You’ll die horribly because I’ll devolve into an idiot who forgets EVERYTHING she knows because she’s being observed.

Common sense tells me, FFS no one is paying you any attention would you calm down but nope. Can’t do it.

So take that Rotun! Your stupid, stupidhead proving groups are absolutely worthless in determining the skill of what could be a large portion of the MMO population.

Wow, I feel better now that I had a rant.

So what do you want to do now Cat? Warbringers?

Sure, and maybe fish for those Tiny Carp we don’t have.

Sounds like a plan, let’s do it!

 

 

 

 

 

How I Hate You Big Love Rocket and Yet … I Want You

Yes, although I’ve repeatedly told Cat the odds are not in her favor she’s managed to recruit quite a few alts to her cause. At first I think I had about six characters bonking those Apothecaries every day but now depending on the queue she’s down to about two or three buddies who haven’t lost hope.

I’ve read that the drop rate for the Big Love Rocket is 0.03%. Aiiieeeee!!! Maybe if it weren’t for that good looking Zhevra hide interior we could let it go … but we can’t.

At least I’m glad that in spite of my desire for a Big Love Rocket I haven’t stooped to upping my odds by sending in the DK and Monk neither of which could fight their way out of a paper bag. Oddly my Hunter who I also have no real clue how to play well does the best damage in there. I think her pet covers up for her lack of skill. So faithful.

So let’s see, what else.

Um yeah, Luz the Paladin. Something’s not right there. We practically had a fight over her leaving Howling Fjord. I told her it was time to move on to an area more challenging, it was time to go. She didn’t want to.

She said she thinks the Vrykul are hot.

???????????

What? Look at him Luz! Does he look like he’s filled with holy light? Honestly, what’s wrong with you?

Here let me quote:

While they may adventure with others from different organizations, they will never knowingly associate with evil persons, nor continue an association with someone who consistently offends their moral code.

This just might be me Luz but the fact that he tries to kill you every time you come near him might, just might fall under the evil person with a suspect moral code don’t you think? Huh?

On one hand I’ve got Cat wandering into Ashran sightseeing and now Luz crushing on Vrykul. I don’t know what to do.

Maybe I  can talk someone into one last shot at that Big Love Rocket today. Take my mind off all the craziness … yeah … that oughta work.