Celestial Tournament … Finally

I found the secret to winning the Celestial Tournament today. If you’re married to a non-gamer they MUST vacate the premises. After my husband left my luck turned around. Today I had more trouble getting past the tamers than with the celestials.

So of course I picked Zao to come home with me after he gave me all that trouble. I took him to say goodbye to his father before leaving the Isle. He seemed a little disoriented. I guess he couldn’t figure how one minute he was kicking my butt and then suddenly it was like someone took a Whole-Body Shrinka’ to him poor guy.

I introduced him around Halfhill and now his training’s begun. I see great things in store for him!

I wanted to thank Navi, Cyrme, Tamer Liopleurodon, Turkic’s post at Blood & Sugar and Mistel for sharing a lot of helpful information that made the Tournament a lot less painful than it would have been otherwise. I know there were others too, I wish I’d bookmarked them.

Zao

Wild Jade Hatchling

Zandalari Footslasher

Clockwork Gnome

Xu-Fu

Tranquil Mechanical Yeti

Blue Clockwork Rocket Bot

Mechanical Pandaren Dragonling

Chi-Chi

Unborn Val’Kyr

Nexus Whelpling

Azure Whelpling

Yu’la

Peddlefeet

Soul of the Aspects

Anubisath Idol

None of these teams are sure things but if the force is with you and the stars align they’ll pull through!

Now … I don’t see me going back anytime soon for the rest of those guys … okay … maybe just Xu-Fu.

What? Oh, I know. Don’t say anything though, she’s sensitive about it. She really needs a visit to a world class transmognificationist. We’ll put that on the to-do list with the Noodle Cart.

Zao Now Brown Cow

It did occur to me that if I kept my big mouth shut you wouldn’t know about all my failures. I thought about it and you know what? There are all kinds of blogs that tell you all about how they did stuff successfully so I see it as a public service to report on my failures for those like me. If you’re out there … maybe I’m alone … yoohoo! Crap, maybe I AM the only one … anyway.

I may frame that screen shot. It might be the closest I’ll ever get to completing the Celestial Tournament. Right now I’m too demoralized to go back. I’m beaten … dejected. I hate stupidhead Zao. Of course this isn’t fair as it wasn’t his fault, it was mine.

After FINALLY admitting to myself that no matter how many hours I stayed in there I was not going to get Zao down, I went a few places to read more on the fights and in one of Tamer Liopleurodon’s videos she mentioned something I never thought about. I had used up all my big guns early on in an attempt to GET TO the Celestials without thinking that I would be sending in the second string after the tamers were down. Poor planning on my part.

When my initial Zao team didn’t succeed I was pretty much left with … well … leftovers. I tried EVERYTHING, I think I was in there for hours. What made it even worse was on the second to the last attempt I managed to scrounge a Wild Jade Hatchling with Call Lightning and two Zandalari raptors with Hunting Party and got him down to 88. Coming so close made it worse.

To my credit (hahaha) I did stop before stooping to sending critters and level 5s out to certain death but I DID NOT WANT TO CONCEDE. I finally came to my senses and left the tournament, head hanging.

I will say, something I never thought would happen did. RNG took pity on me. I have been looking in every Crane Nest since the patch dropped. Nothing. Apparently in an attempt to cheer me up RNG put a Azure Crane Chick in the first Crane Nest I checked. Thank you RNG, I take back all those nasty things I’ve said about you. Honest.

So everyone’s down but Zao. But I’ll have to rearrange my teams before another attempt so it’s back to the drawing board for me. Don’t throw all my heavy hitters out early. And why in the name of Elune is my Darkmoon Zeppelin not level 25? Geeeeeezzz …

Celestial Tournament? Nope, Little Tommy

My husband is on vacation this week so it’s hard to find time to play or write. I’m sneaking on here. Let’s see if I get away with it. The first day of patch 5.4 I looked at the tournament. I ran through oodles of pets trying it out and then forgot about it until Monday night.

Monday night I spent hours trying to find a reliable Taran Zhu team. My problem was while I could beat all the tamers, I couldn’t reliably beat all three at the same time. I FINALLY got a decent Taran Zhu team. This is it! Going for the whole shebang! I’m ready! Got to get this done before tomorrow when a whole new bunch of tamers show up.

I have upwards of 230 level 25s. I put my celestial teams together without too much thought about whether they were level 25, cause really, how could they not be right? Wrong. I engage Zao and THEN notice my Crystal Spider is level 16. It went nowhere, I gave up and went to bed.

Tuesday a whole new bunch of Tamers. Same problem. While I can beat them all I can’t beat them all at the same time. Wise Mari would be easy if Nocturnal Strike ever hit but blinded or not it missed 5 out of 6 times so the rest of the team were pretty much toast. Same problem, these guys are not reliable. Must go back to the drawing board or look for advice from more experienced battlers and try again.

So I though I’d show you my RELIABLE team. My sure thing. My Little Tommy Team. They’ve won every day except for the first time they faced him and didn’t know what to expect.

Tranquil Mechanical Yeti starts off with his Call Lightning. He gets switched out and Clockwork Gnome comes in and sets up his Turret. Jade Oozeling comes in and spits Corrosion and hits a few times. Gnome returns to set another turret and if needed Yeti finishes him off with Ion Canon mostly because I just love Ion Cannon but a good bonk on the head would do just as well because Tommy’s pet is running on fumes at that point.

So see, I haven’t been COMPLETELY goofing off. I have ONE reliable team. Those guys are pro. They are going to get extra rations, maybe some NOODLES from a Noodle Cart even.

YAY! I managed to write a whole post undetected! Do I dare take time to check for spelling? Nah … I don’t want to set a precedent like that.

Mine’s Smaller Than Yours

EDIT: I am really having a day. Somehow this morning I managed to not only forget to write half of the intended info, I also turned off comments. I don’t know how since I didn’t even know how to do it. It’s taken me hours to figure out how to turn them back on. And I’ll probably forget. I think I should back away from the computer now and go somewhere safe where I can’t DO ANYTHING ELSE or put anyone in danger.  Sorry, I just had to tell someone cause I was so excited I turned them back on. Yeah, I’ll leave now.

CLARIFICATION

I couldn’t figure out why people thought I was mocking legendary cloak wearers on Twitter. Some of my best friends wear them so I wouldn’t want that. I see now that I should keep my posting until after 8:30 am. I omitted the information the punchline depended on. I do this to my husband all the time I’m told. I make no distinction between conversations in my head and those held out loud.

Anyway, when you get to the part about my realm being “special” it’s because the group was farming in The Blazing Way, the wading pool end … my end, NOT the Ordon Sanctuary. THIS is what tickled me.

Carry on.

Oh … Cat … honey, that won’t work. You’re not fooling anybody, they can just inspect you and see you’re not wearing a legendary cloak. Yes, inspect. You didn’t know? What? Oh, I’m sorry you feel violated, what? Yes, indeed. They can even see the little hearts on your undies. I’m sorry.

After playing WoW all these years I tend to think there are no surprises left but I was wrong. Running around the Timeless Isle I saw a group forming to rep grind. I thought, I should do that! I’m never going to get to exalted with Shaohao on my own by occasionally killing Ordos as I run through their area. I’ll ask for an … oh.

Luckily I saw the next message before I asked, sparing me the embarrassment of rejection.

This group is ONLY for people with the legendary cloak.

ROTFLMAO. Luckily Cat can enter stealth and wait safely while I go into fits … well, almost convulsions of uncontrollable laughter. I have no idea why that tickled me so much but it did. Yes, you caught me. Mine is much, much smaller than yours. I sometimes wonder if my realm is  “special” or if this is the norm. Humans, you gotta love us … sorta.

I certainly admire the dedication it took players to obtain that cloak. I think anyone who did all that for that kid Wrathion should’ve been handed a check for 50,000 gold too … at least. I got three sigils of whatchamacallit and then bailed. Yeah … the second dog is me … hitting the Wall of Three Sigils. Nuh uh … forget that.

I seem to get fixated on things and then MUST do them. I HAD to do the Insane because I was sure it was going away. I became fixated. It was ALL I did for three months. And as it turns out the joke was on me as it stayed in the game, changed but there. I was obsessed with Ironsally, I HAD to get her to 85.

Luckily I was okay with letting the legendary chain pass me by but now I’m worried. I feel the possibility that a fixation may be stalking me. I turned off tracking on the quest in the hope that it would help. It whispers to me though. I’m trying to ignore it … dammit Noodle Cart! Leave me alone.

I’ve been furtively reading accounts of players managing the chain solo. Unfortunately they’ve all been by either Hunters or Death Knights and then I tell myself to get a grip. Don’t listen to the whispers of the Noodle Cart. You don’t even need that food, you want to do that JUST so you can have your own Noodle Cart? That’s crazy talk, pull yourself together!

Why do you chase me, Noodle Cart? WHY?

WoW Personality Test

There’s Cat having the time of her life on the Timeless Isle, I think she’s waiting for her noodle order to be up. She loves it there. I’ve been hearing and reading complaints about the Isle which set me wondering about why I like it so much.

I decided the Isle must be some kind of personality test. Depending on your type you may love it or hate it. In anything that passes for a personality test I come up INFP. There are loads of places that will define this type for you but I see that some of them kind of gloss over the negative so I’ll let you know them.

It’s very hard to stay focused on any one thing. OH! Look! A pretty! Oh, another! Cat! Cat! Come back! Nope, she’s gone.

INFPs are disorganized. Woah Nelly! Did they ever hit that one on the head.

INFPs are very flexible. Read this as I take anything that comes along and except it. I am very adaptable, which I sometimes think is bad as I’m sure other types are busy trying to improve whatever they’re given. Not me.

INFPs don’t like facts and logic. Damn right. I have no time for that fact nonsense.

INFPs don’t notice the everyday details of life maintenance. OMG! Have you been spying on me in my house!

So anyway, back to the Isle. I decided an open-ended, run-all-over-the-place-looking-at-the-things, opening all the boxes, flying clutched high in the air by an albatross kind of place is my kind of place because I am an INFP. I don’t know what else explains me dropping everything else to spend hours happily looting Crane Nests unsuccessfully while occasionally killing any rares that pop up and dancing around as a pink pirate and throwing down Darkmoon Carousel rides for other INFPs to enjoy. What’s not to like!

So I’m just guessing here. Obviously, as we’ve already established that I don’t like facts but I think those who don’t enjoy the Isle must be one of those types with a T in it. Those thinky logical types, instead of a feely type. Those with a mission … and who stick to it. Unlike me … whose plan seems to be not to have one.

Who’s conducting this personality test?  You got me, maybe one of those thinky lore players would know. Me, I’m just sitting here eating lotus noodles enjoying the view of the beach.

Cymre’s Double-Dog Dare

So yesterday Cymre of Bubbles of Mischief posted a link. OH! I must try that! How am I going to convince Cat to go along … hmm … wait! I know! I’ll tell her Cymre double-dog dared us! Oh come on, it’s just a tiny fib.

Well Cat fell for it right away as I knew she would. We started preparations. First was to find suitable soothing Yak music for the on-board music system. Check.

Next, listen to sound advice from Thelandira and Cain. Check. Slow walking engaged.

The pace of the video is admittedly slooooooow. Hopefully you enjoy the music.

All Cat had to say afterwards was, “I ain’t never going back no more.”

Most Heinous Boss Ever … No not Him

THE BEAN COUNTER. Yes, that’s right. Bank alt. We all got an email from failed Mage to report to Darnassus posthaste. WHAT? Come on! We’re busy killing rares and taking albatross rides, we can’t just …

NOW!

While I realize this problem has been caused solely by Cat and Cim, I think you ALL need to hear … NOW.

Crap, what is she on about. Just because she doesn’t have fun out in the world she has to ruin it for all of us. It’s like being called to the principal’s office … or a tax audit. I guess we have to humor her, she DOES hold the purse strings. So … yeah … I guess we can make a quick trip. Sigh …

I’ve called you all here to discuss your funding. While you all are out cavorting on all these … Isles, I’m stuck here (yeah, cause she’s scared) trying to maintain our savings. Something you all seem to have little regard for. Do you like buying battle pets? Yes? Well that’s all going to stop unless changes are made.

Here’s the problem, when 5.4 hit we had around 200,000 gold, in one week this has dwindled to around 180,000. WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE. You frittered away almost 20,000 gold in a week and I know I didn’t buy anything. Whatever it is HAS to change.

Cim, what have you been doing?

You saw all the rares were up in the Vale? Haven’t you already killed them? You want what? SkyShards? And I even have it on good authority that you didn’t even loot that particular rare because he disappeared while you were posing! Have you been doing ANYTHING productive?

OMG! Playing about with Elixir of Wandering Spirits is NOT productive! And do you think mounts grow on trees? That poor overburdened horse …

Alright let’s move along to the worst offender, Cat. Cat, the death has to stop. You cannot continue throwing yourself off mountains because you’re too impatient to wait for the next albatross. Moving about the Isle by death is COSTLY. It has to stop! No one is doing dailies, there’s no income. We cannot afford your repair bills because you’re too lazy to RIDE. This has to stop. I’ll forgive Cim falling off repeatedly while trying to walk on those ropes because she seems to be balance-challenged but you … NO!

Miners, start mining. Gatherers … gather. Chop chop, let’s get moving. To your chores people! Let’s get gold moving in again instead of out.

They were all pretty annoyed with her but she’s got a point. Moving around the Timeless Isle by death and gemming alt’s new finery adds up. Geez, who knew fun was that expensive.

Blizzard’s Revenge or Beware Kittys!

I was vaguely aware there were birds on The Timeless Isle that would pick you up but didn’t get around to investigating until I received the quest, Rolo’s Riddle. For the final step of this quest a ride to an inaccessible place was in order. I have to what? I have to kill an albatross to land? Very funny Blizzard. Some kind of payback for our whining?

Little did I know how much punishment Cat was to receive. But first, I found Mossgreen Lake to be an easy pickup spot. He’ll come low enough for you to do some damage so he’ll stop and pick you up. Kind of 45.50ish. The bad part was when he picked Cat up she turned from Cat to Caster, not good as to get him to drop you you’ve got to kill him. In caster form she’d have a hard time killing a critter.

I fly up to the Red Lake where the final riddle to complete the quest is located and she cannot kill him. She’s out of mana and he’s barely scratched. Now she beats on him a while. Trouble is there’s so much time between her melee hits he keeps moving in between. Now he’s moved out of water dropage range. I finally hearthed to get off him.

Hmm … now I know why people were arriving in the lake area with half-dead birds. A lesson learned. Next flight she hopped, she beat him down way before arriving at the lake so that when she arrived she had regenerated her mana and could kill him in the desired location. Yay! Success! Even get an achievement for it!

Now that I had the whole process down I couldn’t seem to let it go. I hopped another flight and managed to tame a rare Skywisp Moth, a battle pet who frequents those high peaks. Took another ride looking for Sturdy Chests and just sightseeing.

So overall, after a rocky start I really enjoyed my flights. Still kinda waiting to see what form that bad luck from killing an albatross might take though.

Oh! That might be it! I wasn’t going to mention it but Cat’s developed a gambling addiction. That darn Master Kukuru suckers her into that cave every time she gets a little ahead on the coins. They burn a hole in her pocket. And she’s not lucky. Usually spends 500 coins and the box contains 100 coins. Not a good exchange rate. I’ve told her but it’s like she’s possessed. Can’t stop. She’s got the luck of an albatross killer.

Screaming Like a Little Girl

So yesterday I was all happy. Yay! I’m out of my mope! Things are looking up! I’m going to read all the blogs and comment! Yeah … I should have known I was tempting fate. I had sent work off for review. I probably had MOST OF THE DAY to read and then go to the Timeless Isle! YAY!

Nope. I published my post and the phone rang. Phone-ringing early morning is not a good sign. My Mother. Not a good sign. She said she had a doctor appointment and felt too bad to drive, I must drive her. A round trip to my Mother is three hours since she refuses to live close to any of her designated drivers. Okay, what can you do.

I have an irrational fear. Just one … I’m not greedy. Snakes. I really, really hate them. I really, really fear them. I see one and the hair on the back of my head stands up. I get chills. I scream.

So I go to the basement to bring the dogs in from their morning jaunt in the yard. At the bottom of the stairs. IN MY HOUSE! THERE IS A SNAKE.

SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAM! SCREAMING MORE! AND MORE!

Yeah, it went on for a while, the thing’s hearing is probably permanently impaired now but I don’t care, I hate it!

I had to leave to go drive my Mother but for some reason I was convinced snake would get the dogs while I was away. My husband thinks I’m pretty funny. I attribute all sorts of mystical powers to snakes. They could climb the stairs. They could squeeze under the door at the top of the stairs. They could GET THE DOGS!

I must resolve this before I leave. This means I must approach crafty snake. OMG! I get a trash can lid and manage to put in on top of snake. In my mind I have sufficiently protected the dogs. I can get the hell out of the house of doom with a clear conscious.

Four and a half hours later I return. Dogs are okay. We wait for husband to come home. We don’t go down to the basement. I don’t even open the door to the basement lest SNAKE is lurking on the top step … having escaped confinement.

There is a big thunderstorm going on in the background, kind of setting the mood. Husband’s late. FINALLY he arrives. I tell him my snake story which he seems to find amusing.

He’s more afraid of you than you are of him.

BULLSHIT! That’s not even possible.

Snakes are good, they eat rats.

I DON’T CARE, I’M NOT AFRAID OF RATS … JUST SNAKES … please just get him out of here!

So, long story short … I guess that’s not possible. Long story ending. The snake was gone, kind of proving my point that they have super powers. It’s still in the basement. I gave my husband a flashlight to search but snake is too crafty … it’s hidden. IT LIVES … IN MY BASEMENT.

I’m writing this two stories away from the snake but I keep turning around to check my back.

I really did have a WoW related post in mind … but I can’t concentrate on anything but SNAKE.

Anyway, the moral of the story is if something good happens and you’re all happy about it DON’T post it on a WoW blog. Apparently the fates closely monitor WoW blogs for happiness and you may end up with a SNAKE in your basement. Or a RAT or a SPIDER or … I don’t know a WEIMARANER … just insert your own irrational fear. I’m not kidding … be careful.

Signing off … two staircases away from the basement.

Blog Lurker Recidivism

I’ve been writing posts coming on three years soon. Before that … I was a lurker. Yes … a WoW blog lurker. When I started posting it wasn’t scary as I knew no one was reading them but me. I entertained myself with posts about my dog. I got a comment! And I see that while I’ve been talking about my dogs and yelling about crap, my first commenter has written a whole book! Must remember to look into that.

Anyway, I piddled along for another year or so. I replied to my commenters … I became a replier. A baby step forward. Then came an event that changed everything. Blog Azeroth Thanksgiving Event. I had to get a Twitter account, YIKE! Okay, I’m still crappy at Twitter, but still it was a start.

I started commenting, ON BLOGS OTHER THAN MINE. I made lots of WoW friends which was the whole point of this exercise. I chatted without a care in the world. I wasn’t a lurky LURKER anymore. Nobody cared that I’m a friend of run-on sentences and totally eschew grammar and punctuation. There was no judging. I felt at home.

Recently an event irl depressed me. I thought I would feel relieved when it happened but I didn’t. Go figure … even I don’t understand me. I’d be the first to admit I have a fragile psyche but what I don’t understand was why this event knocked me back briefly into blog lurker land.

NO ONE CARES ABOUT WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY STUPID, JUST SHUT UP! Yeah, I do self-loathing real well. I felt like this.

And the very WORST thing is … LOOK AT THAT GUY! Not a hesitation … not a glance … NOTHING while she goes down in flames … okay water. Yeah … nobody cares … boo hoo … nobody cares …

I deleted posts … here’s a picture.

I totally lost my nerve. I hung out in places like this trying to get my mojo back. I know! Pathetic.

But an inquiry came from one of my blogging friends. Was everything alright? It wasn’t, but I lied … I know, I’m awful but the thing is her concern is what turned things slowly around. I love her for that.

I have met so many kind and caring people in the WoW community who MORE than compensate for the in-game ratbastards. So yeah … you’ve been warned. I may be commenting again. Saying stupid things that no one cares about that I don’t care about whether anyone cares about … come on, you know what I mean.